A stranger has taken over my kitchen and is in the process of taking over my garden as well. My kitchen, which had been my terrain for almost 25 years has now become an unfamiliar place. I have to ask this stranger where I can find my plates, where has the sugar disappeared to and the salt and the frying pan? I have become dependent on a stranger. But am I complaining? No. I wake up and a mug of coffee is ready for me beside my bed and hot water bottle to warm my painful back and a massage to sooth my aching legs and feet. An hour later breakfast is on the table, the plants which have been much neglected during the hot days are perking up with a new spirit, the result of daily attention. My house which has always been clean now enjoy daily cleaning and not a speck of dust is allowed to settle. My friend M walks in and declares that the flat is very clean. “There is a nice feel of freshness about it,” she says. I protest. My flat has always been clean, I say!
After having procrastinated for years about hiring a helper I have now surrendered, too easily me thinks, to the comfort and ease of life that a domestic worker provides. Old age, aching joints and muscles, plummeting energy levels have relieved me of my inclination to control, dominate and generally be demanding, that a much younger self would have. But my life has changed. Another person in the house is a welcome change
As you would have guessed by now I have succumbed to hiring a foreign domestic worker, one of the 269 thousand women (according to a 2022 statistics) employed by households in Singapore. Mine, A is a Filipina woman, who had escaped from abuse by her former employer. One woman I was expecting from Irian Jaya is still, a month later, held up at an Indonesian Immigration point. It is worrying. So I was advised by the agent to take on a ‘transferred’ maid. I was horrified on the first day when A asked permission to use the toilet. “Why are you asking my permission?” I asked. “I don’t want to know when you go to the toilet”. In response she said that her former employer insisted on asking permission every time she used the toilet, one of the many ways the employer disempowered A and denied her her humanity and dignity.
“Abuses” of foreign domestic workers in Singapore, according to a report by Human Rights Watch, include “confiscation of passports, personal belongings, and religious items; threats and physical abuse; illegal or dangerous employment assignments; and refusal to remove women from abusive employment situations.”– excerpt from ‘Maid to Order’, a report by Human Rights Watch.
For a change of employer A is committed to surrendering four month’s wages to the agency which in A’s case amount to $2,400/ (a princely sum to her I am sure) I am happy to pay for the services rendered to me by the agency but by demanding A’s wages the agency is charging twice for the same service. Why is this practice allowed to continue?
Asking permission to poo and pee is an ultimate in the abuse of power and control.
[ The image above was a campaign poster taken from the TWC2 publication “Dignity Overdue” (2006) ]
Connie 